Today, 15th August, is India’s Independence Day where we celebrate India’s independence from the British Empire back in 1947. India’s current flag (shown below) was instated post-independence and has never changed.
Well, I think it is time for a change! I mean what is that wheel anyways? Why do we have a circular object that revolves on an axle and is fixed below a vehicle or other object to enable it to move over the ground in the centre of our beloved flag. Surely, it should be a symbol more representative of India and something the world easily easily associates with India. (While I am being silly and humorous in this post, if you truly wish to understand the significance of the wheel, check out this Wikipedia page: Ashoka Chakra)
So I have taken it upon myself to create some alternate versions of the flag with symbols the world thinks are more closely associated with India:
Flag #1: The One with the Turban and Handlebar Mustache.
Surely you seen such a man walking around, probably talking really loudly with a brother dressed in a similar fashion and planning to drink and have Butter Chicken later in the evening. He’s Sikh, often Punjabi and an extremely common stereotype of Indian, especially to people in London.
Flag #2: The One with the Man on Fire
This is not a stereotype of Indians but rather one of non-Indians eating Indian spicy food. I am unapologetic about it though. If you enjoy bland food, you probably have a bland personality. Besides, the popularity of Indian food leads me to believe that all humans are slightly masochistic and enjoy the burn making this the perfect flag to represent our country.
Flag #3: The One with the Cow
I feel like this flag is pretty self-explanatory since everyone thinks that all Indians love cows. However, the truth is Hindus worship cows and the rest of Indians are fine with worshipping their steak after devouring it. I am personally indifferent about the cow’s divine status but I get really annoyed when I am stuck in a two hour traffic jam when a cow decides to give birth in the middle of a junction and we are not allowed to move it to a less inconvenient location.
Flag #4: The One where India Hasn’t Won a Medal Yet
The flag’s lack of a symbol represents India’s current performance at the Rio Olympics 2016. You’d think we would be able to produce at least one medal-winning athlete among our 1.25 billion population but we seem to only produce world-class engineers.
Flag #5: The One with the Hockey Stick and Ball
We can still show some respect and support towards our sportsmen and women by using the field hockey stick and ball as the symbol in our flag since Hockey is our national sport.
…………Yeah right, Indians don’t care at all about hockey and we aren’t even that good at it sadly. We do care a lot about something else though…
Flag #6: The One with the Cricket Bat and Ball
CRICKET!!!!! Yes, India is a country where cricket gets more news coverage than crime and celebrities, where managers and employees will both call in sick to office and then bump into each other in the stadium, and where boys want to grow up to be cricketers and girls want to be their wives. Cricket is actually the national sport of UK but I am pretty sure we have surpassed them in the game – it is probably revenge for our colonization.
Flag #7: The One that is My Favourite
Yes, this flag is my favourite because India, in all of it’s glory and imperfection, will always be #1 to me and I am proud to be Indian. And so I’d just like to say…
Happy Independence Day!